Quick Update, WC 300

Today, I am flowing along pretty well.  I have written about 300 words, but that is in the process of editing and re-writing.  So, while my word count is up 300, that doesn’t count the number of words I actually took out and replaced.  It could be closer to 600.  However, my goal is not to make this scientific. It’s all about my accountability experiment.

Accountability. Websters defines accountability as:

Main Entry:

ac·count·abil·i·ty 

Pronunciation:

\ə-ˌkau̇n-tə-ˈbi-lə-tē\

Function:

noun

Date:

1794

: the quality or state of being accountable ; especially : an obligation or willingness to accept responsibility or to accountfor one’s actions <public officials lacking accountability>

It’s something that I have put on a sticky note and posted beside my computer. It’s also placed on the heel pad of my laptop. Accountability. It keeps us moving forward and looking ahead. This six syllable word makes me slog away…even when I really just want to sit on my sofa and read or watch chick flicks.

So, my wish for everyone today is that they are able to increase their word count and remain accountable to themselves.

Word Count

I noticed today as I was reading other blogs by writers that many of them include a daily word count. You know, that’s enough to make me scratch my chin and say hmmmm…..  So, that is one good way of holding myself accountable, by posting my actual word count.

I don’t feel like others will think I am as successful due to the fact that my genre is children’s and more specifically, children’s books. However, I am also a blogger: this page, my blog on the environment (which is woefully neglected right now), and my personal one that I haven’t made public. Do I add that to my word count? Or do I do two separate ones?

I do most of my writing in Word and then transfer over to my blogs, so the actual word count is easy to compile. But, I wonder, why do we place so much emphasis on said word count? I know that we have to get our work taken care of and that word count is a good way for us to see what we have accomplished. Word count is also a way of setting goals, so it makes sense.

Well, I am off to storyboard.  I have been using Microsoft’s One Note, but I think I like it my way, post it notes and a blank wall. It’s my canvas of multi-colored fun.

Blog Word Count–230

Loose Ends…

Loose ends are the worst. I have two books that are for all intents and purposes, complete.  However, it’s the loose ends on these books that I need to finish. There are a few places where I feel that the story doesn’t “connect” the subsequent story together. I don’t want to force what I am writing, because it is not my best, but I am getting frustrated at not having these two “tied up”.

What’s a gal to do? First, I am turning to my biggest supporter, my husband. He is a good critic and has a good eye for telling me where things might not be flowing as well. It’s amazing at what having a second set of eyes will do for you.

Next, I need to just free write. Maybe if it start out free writing, the ideas will flow. My muse in one of the stories sings to me and she hasn’t done that in a while. Maybe, just maybe, she will start again. I love picturing this character doing her thing. Dancing, singing and enjoying life. Let’s see how it goes.

It could be that I am also nervous about NaNoWriMo…it’s looming large and beast-like on the horizon. I start thinking, “which book do I write”; “have I lost my mind”; and “your ‘effing crazy”. Among other things that I choose not to put in this forum for sake of maintaining decorum.

Yet, my mind wanders…is it writers block? Could I have unwittingly blocked myself out of my own fear of completion? I do fear completion. It is one of my worst attributes. I fear completing what I write, because I am afraid I will never have another good, no great, idea. If I complete my work and send it off, it means I have to create something else–which is refreshing when new. It’s like that first kiss–all butterflies and excitement.

I will get through this. First things first, I need to set the bar higher. Expect more of myself so that others will respect what I do. In return, I feel that it will make me a better writer. I hope so. I realize writing this that I need to believe more in myself. That it’s my lack of belief in myself that hinders me and causes me to create these loose ends.  Self-introspection. Now, I just have to keep telling myself over and over until it sinks in.

Finding Your Voice

I went to my writers club last night and listened to Kay McSpadden speak about “Finding Your Voice”. She was informative and enthusiastic. She was nervous because we weren’t 16 and in high school. Unlike high school, she didn’t make me fall asleep. I was enthralled and excited to hear her message.

Every writer has a voice, no matter what your “niche” or “genre” is. Mine is children’s and humor, with a little social/environmental and popular fiction.  However, I am concentrating on children’s right now. It’s the hardest thing I have ever written. Oh, I don’t have to force the stories out, but I do have to work on my content and trying to blend seamlessly from child to adult.

Mrs. McSpadden said right off the bat that you “have to find your purpose”. What is my purpose in writing? Is it to be published? While I would love to be a “real” author, that is not my purpose. Plain and simple, I love writing. I tell everyone I am a writer. It keep me in my mindset.

Time for a “Lisa” lesson. I read with the Gaston Literacy Council and it fulfills me in so many ways. We read with second graders who are at risk of failing the End of Grade testing in third grade. Once a week, I sign in at my son’s elementary school and I meet the child I am reading with in their classroom. We walk the long hallway to the area outside the principal’s office, pick out a book in their comprehension level, and sit down and read.  It fills me with awe every time they “get” it. You can tell when they do…it’s a look that they get on their face and when they get it, they are hooked. They are readers. It’s at that moment that we change and we go up a level and I encourage them and cheer for them. I have wondered if at times I needed to bring pom-poms to school and do a cartwheel. I am as excited as they are. We celebrate even more as I encourage my kids to take the Accelerated Reader (AR) tests and just the accomplishment of not only taking those tests, but meeting their goals for the nine weeks is as exciting for them as it is for me.

Now that I have digressed so beautifully, I shall carry on with Kay’s message. She said that your purpose has to suit your niche. If you write popular fiction, it has to be entertaining. That’s why it is popular.  If you are writing non-fiction, it needs to teach something. if you are an op-ed writer, you have to be persuasive. All of these things are part of your purpose as each piece that you write has a reason for being.

The second thing she spoke about was “knowing our audience”. You do have to know your audience. I know mine quite well. I am not only a mother, but as you already learned, I know what stories make my kids that I read with really twitch to read. When you are seven, I can tell you, it doesn’t take a lot and it’s generally mischief. If I wrote “literature” I would need to make sure that I challenged my readers. That I made them think and ponder endlessly. If I wrote op-eds, I would need to give both sides of the position. It’s pretty simple; learn your audience and you will weave your craft so much more easily.

Finally, we discussed style. You know what style is, the things you would rather have an editor worry about. We discussed sentence structure, word structure and the importance of using it in your niche. If I were writing non-fiction, I would be looking for accuracy on even the most minute detail. I agree that if your writing style is very wooden it sinks your story. However, you can have a unique writing style and if you do, even a poorly plotted book can do well. The key point is, know what your message is; if you don’t, it can get lost in artifice and style.

What did I take away from her lecture? That so far, I am doing a-OK. I am staying pretty close on track to my own style of writing and I learned a few things that will aid me in the meantime. I call that a lesson learned.

Paper, pens and writing tools! Oh my!

I love the tools of my craft. Paper, pens, pencils…anything to do with writing. It doesn’t mean that I write well, but it makes me feel so cozy to cuddle up in my bed, a Levenger Annotation 1/4 Ruled Writing Pad, Tul pen, lap desk, and a great big glass of water.  This is my idea of nirvana. Not a laptop in sight and nothing to take my attention away from the pristine sheet of paper awaiting my virgin thoughts.

There are so many other things I would love to take into my writing cocoon. I would have books such as: Words That Make A Difference and More Words That Make A Difference. My copy of the Childrens Writer’s and Illustrator’s Market, the most recent Writer’s Digest and an unabridged Oxford English Dictionary.  Oh, I am sure that I could find more things if I sat here long enough. The list could be grossly disproportionate to the space that I have on my queen-size bed.

However, it does make me ponder…do we think that we become better writers when we use many different tools to craft our trade?  Does the seemingly endless supply of pens and papers really help? What about the latest technological gadget? Do we need the fastest computer on the market? Five different types of word processing software? How about fancy highlighters in each color?

Sometimes, I go to the store, whether it be an office supply store or a big box store, and I am just overwhelmed by the sheer volume.  What I do is such a solitary life and profession. There are days I am desperate just to hear a human voice.  Could it be that I am replacing my human contact with fancy tools to keep me occupied and happy? Or is it that I am just an office supply junkie? I was a paralegal in my former life and let me tell you, there is nothing quite like the smell of copy machine toner to give you that chemically induced buzz first thing in the morning. 

There are those days that I am surprised I haven’t flushed my phone down the toilet.  It seems that when I am able to shift into my right-brain mode easily that my phone rings continuously.  Those are the days that I find myself walking a very thin line, wanting to yell “buggar off you prats”. However, at the risk of offending every I know, have managed to stay restrained.

There are many days I feel that people don’t understand. They think I have endless hours in the day. That I can do whatever, whenever and that when I am on a roll that it’s something I can stop just as easily as I start. When I get into my groove, I don’t like stopping. I want to write until my right-hand is cramped in a toilsome frenzy. I am in pain and can’t write anymore…yet, I press on. I can soak it in a bowl of ice water afterwards. What is important is I get my thoughts on paper.

What about a computer? I have a nice blue laptop named “Belle”. She is quick and holds my work beautifully. However, I don’t “flow” as well using Belle as I do when I am writing with paper and pen. I wish I did…it would save time…but I savor my time with my pen and paper, just as those that came before me. The writers who wrote on scraps of paper, late into the night by candlelight and lantern. Those who didn’t have the modern advantages that I am afforded.

I am grateful for the ease of acquiring my tools of the trade. Right now, I seem to have found a good combination that I enjoy and that helps bring me a little sense of guilty pleasure to my writing.  Maybe that is what this is all about. Staying happy and having that something that helps give me that extra nudge– I love to see blank pages filled with words. When I fill those pages with words, I feel happy and satisfied. Speaking of those filled pages, I have a new Levenger catalog to peruse and notepads to order…toodles!

My self-editor

My self-editor doesn’t like me. We have a love-hate relationship. I liken her to a teacher I had in the 8th grade whom I didn’t get along with very well. She was an English teacher and really caused me a lot of grief because I left her class halfway through to go to the academically gifted program. I feel that she thought that program was a waste of time. We could have done more in my AG class, but what I didn’t receive in some areas (grammar), I had so many doors opened in others. My AG teacher introduced me to classical music, computers (this was 1984!), vocabulary, Shakespeare and creative writing.

I love writing. More importantly, I love expressing myself creatively. I can be a very logical “left-brain” type of person. I think it’s because I married an economist. Let’s blame him. An economist who is a classical violinist. He can be very creative and after being married for 9 years, I just recently found at that he is more of an optimist than pessimist. I had no idea, I seriously thought that he was a pessimist. If you spoke to him, you would think the same thing. However, he doesn’t use his creative side or “right-brain” that often. He burned out. Badly.

Me? I quit writing for a long time due to many issues. My biggest one is my lack of self-confidence. I fail miserably in that area. Second, I am a procrastinator. I love nothing more than waiting to the last minute to do something. I do my best work that way. However, I am fighting that step by step. Part of the steps I am taking is setting deadlines for myself. I have to create the mindset that I am going to have a deadline and that my writing has to be at a certain point. This way, I will force myself to write well for a better part of the time.

While I realize that I am going to get behind…like when my muse decides to go on vacation. That’s not often and the more that I write, the more ideas I receive from my muse. She wakes me up in the middle of the night and I use the voice recorder on my phone to mumble whatever it is I am thinking of. I used to try and write it down, but my handwriting is hard enough to read at times, let alone after writing it down bleary eyed in the middle of the night. However, my editor is turned off then.

I love it when my editor turns off, but that is rare. I have to actually work at turning off my self-editor. My self-editor turns on and says “every word you are writing is complete dribble. What do you think you are doing woman? You need to rework that sentence. How can you leave it hanging there?” I would really like to respond and said “buggar off you daft cow”, but I am not sure she would listen.

So, that is where I am at…progressing, while trying to block out that nagging voice in my head. One day, I will win–or at least just learn to ignore her.

Diddly Squat

That is exactly what I have gotten done the past two days. Diddly squat. Nothing, nada, nunca, zip. My husband calls it a great big goose egg. Why? It’s not for trying. I seem to be the person that everyone calls–because for some reason, they feel that I have gigantic “S” taped to the front of my bosoms and can do it all. I am not talking about really close friends, I am talking about people that aren’t close friends calling–acquaintances. 

I have advised for my dear friends on simple things…a couple of fragrances for a soap making business; my dear friend who is having confidence issues with her online store; and working with another friend about opening her own business. Oh and helping one that is going back to school at 15 years with her writing. These are the things I don’t mind. I love them and it hasn’t taken much of my time–time that I would have wasted in other areas.

However, over the last week, I seem to be the go-to person for random acquaintances. Need print correction, call Lisa. Need a .pdf unlocked and you don’t know how to right-click on properties? Call Lisa. Need someone to work on the calendar committee and you just happen to be standing right there in front of them? Call Lisa. I haven’t committed to the calendar deal yet for the school board…that’s a lot of time and my fall is going to be coming to a fast close before I know it.

So, again, to sum it all up: Diddly Squat. Well, maybe not complete diddly squat…I had a book idea that I had been tossing around mentally and it’s starting to play out mentally…enough that I had to email myself from my Blackberry today with ideas. I think it’s going to be a lovely young adult novel. Who knows? It could be another NaNoWriMo contender.

Tonight I am prioritizing for the rest of the week. It’s time to re-read the 7 Habit of Highly Effective People as well. Wish me luck!

 

My constant companion!

Excited, yet nervous.

Well, I did it. I joined my local writers club. It’s a varied group of people. There are published authors, self-published authors and those us of slogging in the trenches. I don’t mind the trenches being my current state of residence. What I do mind is people not thinking I have anything to do just because I am “at home all day”. 

I still have a household to run. Volunteer activities-check. Committee’s to serve on. Check. Bills to pay. Check. Laundry. Check. After-school activities. Check. I could go on. I was working on my calendar one night and my husband was amazed at how much I actually have to do. It helps get their attention if you list everything. That way, they really start to get it. But they don’t, not really.

Yet again, I digress. I am nervous about my group. Nervous, yet excited all in the same sentence. It will be great meeting others with the same issues about what they do, how they do it. It will also be nice to get some perspective from others in the same boat. If I had to answer, when I attend next week, what is my biggest problem? I would probably say, actually sitting down and working without distractions. I know that they are unavoidable, but I am talking about distractions that are, well, self-imposed. Like checking my email for the 10th time in an hour…even though it automatically filters in. Social networking. It’s a blessing and a curse. I love it and have met great new people and reconnected with old friends and colleauges. Yet…it’s another time sucker.

I will be curious to hear what they have to say. Probably “turn off your wireless connection.”  I think that I have one better. It’s going to be cooling off soon and I am going to head outside, with nothing more than pen and paper. My writing actually flows much better with just pen and paper….maybe I should take my own advice.

Creating deadlines

I can be a very logical person. Trying to blend my creative streak with my logic has been difficult at times. Today, is one of those days. My current project is tackling autism. It’s an interesting subject and I have found that having to weave both worlds is testing me. The logical side is doing research and loving it. The creative side that weaves the words in a “tell-able” form is struggling.

I am a think-outside the box, let’s see how things look from all angles person. I am only thinking on one side today. Here’s to hoping tomorrow is a more creative day. My schedule is really full, but that is ok. I tend to work better when I am under stress.

I am trying to change that…the stress driving me deal. I want to be more relaxed as I write and flow more freely. Free flowing is a much better way in my opinion. I like to get a general idea of what I am going to tackle and then flow. A mind map. Mind maps are a creative way to think logically. Guess it is time to break out my Student Study Skills text book and refresh myself.

Other than my logic/creative tug-of-war, things are actually starting to pan out. I am hoping to be finished with my first book in two weeks. My writers group meets in two weeks as well. It will be nice to talk to other people who understand. Other writers.