Nagging thoughts of doubt

Shakespeare wrote “To be or not to be.” As a writer and “content producer” I’m constantly using the tone we’ve heard those words uttered with so many times to ask “long form or short form.” Admittedly, I can get wordy. Verbose. Chatty. Long-winded. You name it, I can go there.  But, I’m trying to figure out what the people that read me want.

Readers, what do you want? Writers, what do you want to write? Is it a combination? Which do you find more difficult? Which do you find more fulfilling? At this point, I’m pretty sure you want to throttle due the sheer volume of questions I ask when I blog here.

Creatives are a questioning lot. We question every thing we do. We stand and look in the mirror, when we have the confidence to do so, and question ourselves. Our confidence wanes more often than not, which explains why a lot of great writers were suicidal, drunk, drugged up, or just miserable.

I’m not miserable, but I question myself all the time. I do it out loud. If I don’t keep these nagging thoughts inside me, the lighter I feel. It’s a healthy way of looking at the creative life I lead. However, I’ll admit the  nagging thoughts of doubt have been very strong lately. So strong, it’s nauseating.

I want to run away and hide from these doubts. But running only makes them stronger, leaving me weakened, further inundated with their power. And doubts are powerful. They are so much powerful than any positive messages we send ourselves. Even though when we send ourselves the positive messages, the dopamine flooding our bodies is a welcome relief.

It’s only been a few weeks ago I wrote about the creative life, vision and possibilities (linked below) on my day “blog.” What Have i learned? Well, I’m still here writing about it and that, in and of itself, tells you were I am.

Trying to push through, ignoring the nagging thoughts of doubt, and using my creativity… as much as it will let me.

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